plastic jesus 'Plastic Jesus' is an old American folk song whose tradition has sprouted many remakes and additional lyrics. I added five verses of my own. The first two below are standards from the original version by Ernie Marrs. My verses follow these two. I don't care if it rains or freezes long as I got my plastic Jesus sittin' on the dashboard of my car comes in colors - pink and pleasant glows in the dark 'cause it's iridescent take it with you when you travel far get yourself a sweet madonna dressed in rhinestones sitting on a pedestal of abalone shell goin' ninety I'm not wary 'cause I've got my virgin mary assuring me that I won't go to hell ------------------------------------------ calling out to all believers save your soul from all deceivers through the door to live for evermore just one step will seal your future accept him as your only teacher and your heart will always rise and soar finding words for plastic jesus through his plan he haunts and pleases nailed upon a cross of pain and thorns sailing through a sea of strife how can I make it through this life? just hoping for a chance to be reborn buy yourself some fuzzy dice to remind you of the sacrifice a gamblin' man can't live without a take just roll them once and then roll twice you must pay heed to my advice the gold you seek on earth is surely fake please tell me a good ole story hoping that it will not bore me 'cause I'm singin' praise to my sweet lord deaf to all your jokes and antics count myself among fanatics fools and dreamers cast upon the shore now I'm finished with my query those with ears - now can you hear me? riddles solved by bible tales and lore sitting back sleep rest assured my troubles now are gone for sure 'cause jesus is the one who I adore